First week of the new semester: DONE!!!

Well the first week of school is over and done thank The Lord!!! The boys are doing pretty good, both have some behavior issues but nothing serious. They  both like going and love riding the bus. 

Ashlyn on the other hand isn't thrilled, she's missing her old friends and the familiarity of being with the same people since kindergarten. She'll be fine though there's a boy at her new school she knows from a summer program she's attended for a few years and she's bringing a little girl from her class home today with her that lives a couple of streets over from us. One of Jared's friends also just bought a house in our neighborhood a few streets over and he has a son the same age as Ashlyn so hopefully they can be friends. 

Being a street over from the school definitely has it's perks!!! It's less than 10 minutes to walk there to pick her up and that pushing a quad stroller! I discovered yesterday though that having them walk and Pasha go in his wheel chair it took us 8 minutes just to get half way down our street! 

Welcome to 2014.....

What a crazy and busy holiday season we had. Right before Thanksgiving we moved and as if that isn't hard enough with 5 kids we all got the flu minus our 10 year old that week of Thanksgiving. We took forever getting well and trying to finish unpacking while feeling so bad was really tough. Our Christmas was pretty good, the boys really enjoyed opening gifts. The day after Christmas we had invited my parents, grandma and sister to come over and have dinner. I spent the whole day cooking I made 2 meatloaves, 2 corn casseroles, mashed potatoes and a big Greek salad. Around 4pm I was in the kitchen cooking and Jared was with the kids in the family room when I heard him yell. Kaeden one of the 3 year olds had reached up and poked him in the eye. By the time everyone got here and sat down to eat Jared was in a lot of pain and asked me to take him to the ER. So we left the kiddos here with everyone and headed to the hospital. They confirmed it was a cornea abrasion and gave us some meds. The next day we went to an opthomologist who gave more meds and scheduled a check up for a few days later. We ended up having to go back to him early because it was still hurting him so much, the abrasion was actually a tear and he had to cut a flap off his eye over the pupil. After another check up Jared's eye is healing but his vision is cloudy in that eye, the part of the cornea isn't attaching back to the rest of his eye like it should. So more medicine and more follow ups, we are praying his vision in that eye is restored since his job is inspecting things.....

Anyways on the adoption front since we moved we had to update our home study again and re do almost everything. We are almost done and hopefully will have everything ready for our dossier by mid Feb. As much as I hate these delays I know it's all in Gods timing. We are finishing up our shoe and clothing drive in the next few weeks! Yay!!! I'm so ready to not be digging through used clothes and shoes! Lol between that fundraiser, our tax return and the money left from selling our other home after remodeling our new one we hope to only need a few thousand to bring 2 children home!!! As of right now we need about $15,000 to do that.

I know I'm going to have critics about us moving and remodeling a home while fundraising but let me tell you we downsized. We bought a smaller home that's older. So yes of course moving costs money but we sold our previous home and are using those profits to remodel this one and make it handicap accessible (our old home wasn't handicap accessible either).  This home is in a much better area and zoned to really good schools. So far we love it, I'm close enough to walk to the elementary school.  Well I need to go  do some paperwork to bring my girls home so I'll leave you with a few Christmas photos.

Decorating cookies for Santa

Christmas Eve

The aftermath of opening gifts!!!

Thanksgiving

Today is thanksgiving and we have tons to be thankful for but I'm too tired and sick to even put a coherent thought together. The flu has hit our household:( it started with Savannah and is working its way through us. 

So our thanksgiving is consisting of coughing, fevers, snotty noses, whiny kids and cranky parents. 

But we are still collecting clothing and shoes for the fundraiser so keep the donations coming:)

My most favoritist pair of shoes....

I'm going to tell you all about my favorite pair of shoes, now when you see the picture of them you'll wonder what the heck is wrong with me! 

They're over a year old, they're faded and dirty, my toes are almost busting through the fabric but I love them. They really aren't even comfortable but they're still my faves. 

There's a special reason they are my favorite though and after you hear why you'll maybe understand a little more about how sentimental I am and how determined I am to reach our fundraising goal of 15,000 pairs of shoes. 

I bought these shoes at Payless for like $9.99 in August of 2012 so they weren't expensive or so stylish that I must hold on to them forever. I was shopping that day with someone else and for someone else. You see Masha was with me, we were shopping for her. I bought her a pair of the exact shoes as these that day. She wore hers everyday she was here for the rest of the short time she was with us. So you see when I look at those shoes and wear them it takes me back to those few weeks she spent in our home. The memories come in even clearer when I see them. I remember snagging them on the door at one of the hotels we were staying in on that dreaded trip to North Carolina to take her to the airport. All those feelings come rushing back. I don't need the shoes of course to remember but they're just a tangible something to touch and actually see. It's hard for me to  speak about her now without crying, even to Jared I just can't without tearing up. She is why we are still fundraising and saving. She is why I look like a hoarder right now (my house is full of bags of clothes and shoes) She is why I'm trying so hard to get the rest of the money needed to adopt a second child ($15,000) yes the possibility is still small but I have to try, we love her as our own.

I'm sending my favorite shoes with the rest of the donated shoes, I think it's only appropriate.....I'll probably cry when I slip them off and put them in at the last minute for the trucks......and I'll pray that they help me to be reunited with my shopping partner so we can buy new shoes again together.

And the shoe drive continues!!!

Still collecting shoes and clothing items for our big fundraiser!!! My house looks like we could be on an episode of hoarders buried alive, seriously it's bad! 

Yes I have a ton in my house and the other 3 families also are collecting also but we still need a lot more...

Please help us bring our kids home! 

My living room

Shoes from Callens teacher!

Bags piled on the guest bed

Bags piled in Savannah's room

San Antonio Trip

Pasha and I took a 2 day trip to San Antonio to go and be evaluated for the VEPTR procedure at Christus Santa Rosa Children's Hospital. We won't know for sure if he's a candidate for the surgery for about 2 weeks but the surgeons that saw us think he will be. It was a long 2 days there full of tests. He had a CT scan, sedated MRI, EEG, EKG, blood work, lots of X-rays and saw a pulmonologist. So now we wait.....

While we were there we took a trip to the RiverCenter mall to have lunch with a friend and her new son! They adopted him from the same country that Pasha is from last month. The boys are a few months apart and both have Spina Bifida so I'm excited to see them develop a friendship! 

The hole in my heart.....

There's a hole in my heart....it started in August of 2012 and in April of 2013 it got even bigger. It's a huge gaping ugly wound that's giving me issues. It's caused by a teenage girl that my heart thinks of as my daughter. 

It's really hard to explain to anyone who hasn't gone through something like this how it feels. I'm also the type of person who doesn't like to show my emotions in front of others. Even Jared has only seen me cry a few times, the times he has seen me cry the majority have been over this girl. I like to do my crying in private, usually in the shower. Well pretty much every day since April I have cried over this child. 

This is why I have to try again, this is why I'm begging for help with fundraising. What would you do if you left part of your heart half a world away? What lengths would you go to? I have held this child when she was sick, crying, sad, laughing and scared. She's not just a photo we fell in love with. We all miss her terribly and want her home. I need to try again so my heart can heal because its hard to function with a huge gaping hole........

I left part of my heart there, can you help me return for it? 

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